Mice cry to keep their eyes wet. They've found male mouse tears contain a sex pheromone that acts as an aphrodisiac that ends up in their fur and nest.
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AMZGTEARS
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Why did the girl attorney stop dating the boy attorney #joke #riddle
Here are the popular answers to the riddle "Why did the girl attorney stop dating the boy attorney?":
Because they had a conflict of interest.
Because she didn't like his briefs.
Because he lost his appeal.
Try this:
Why didn't Mrs. Skeleton leave Mr. Skeleton?
Why don't fish go near a computer?
Why did the android go to a psychologist?
Why did Mr. and Mrs. Arithmetic go to a counselor?
Why is a bulldog like an auctioneer?
Why did Zorro engage in so many sword fights?
Why did the witch go out into the desert?
Why didn't the shark have to pay cash at the checkout counter?
Find the answers here.
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what did the boy measuring stick say when he saw the girl measuring stick? #joke
The most common punchlines to this joke are: "pleased to metre you", "nice to meter you" and "there’s trouble a foot".
In 2002, the world’s funniest joke was discovered by Richard Wiseman in collaboration with The British Science Association. They made a year-long online search for the world's funniest joke. There we're 40,000 entries, submitted by people from more than 70 countries. But the entry submitted by a psychiatrist in Manchester, England, prevailed, with 65 per cent. Here it is:
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, “My friend is dead! What can I do?”. The operator says “Calm down. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says “OK, now what?”
According to Wiseman, this joke won because "This one had real universal appeal." It appeals to people in many countries, to men and women, and young and old alike.
From TIME, Joe Biden helped kick off Seth Meyers’ tenure as host of NBC’s "Late Night" with a joke about the 2016 presidential race. Find out more here.
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What did the baby buzzard say when it saw an orange in the nest? #baby #buzzard #nest
Question: What did the baby buzzard say when it saw an orange in the nest?
Answer: "Look at the orange mama laid!" (Referring to "orange marmalade")
Try some of these math riddles:
You have 7 tennis b@lls that are all identical but one of them is slightly lighter than the others. Using a balance scale and only two separate weightings, how can you find the light tennis ball?
Two boys, Trevor and Tyler, are running a 100 meter race. The first time they race Trevor beats Tyler by 5 meters. To make things fair, the next time they race Trevor stands 5 meters behind the starting line. Who wins the second race (assuming they run the same speed as the first race)?
There are five hen and rooster pairs. Each pair has one baby every month. How many chickens will there be in one year?
There are 100 passengers boarding a 100 passenger airplane. When passenger 1 gets onto the plane, he is disoriented, so he randomly picks a seat. Each of the remaining passengers (2, 3, 4, etc.) get onto the plane and take their seat if it is available or picks one of the remaining seats at random if it is not. What is the chance that the last passenger (passenger 100) will get his seat?
You can view the answers at Good Riddles Now.
The single most important thing to remember when attempting to solve hard riddles is that they are meant to trick you. Learn to answer hard and tricky riddles at Howtodothings.com.
Of interest, according to a new report published by the Boston-based research group Pioneer Institute, the Common Core math standards will not prepare U.S. students for advanced math classes that, consequently, will see lower enrollments. This situation, the report’s authors say, will ultimately lead to a dumbing down of college STEM curricula. Read more here.
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(the riddle) Why are there no wal-marts in a war zone? #warzone #targets #funny #riddle #war
The solution to the riddle “Why are there no Walmarts in a war zone?” is “There is no Walmarts in a war zone because they are all Targets.” The first Walmart store opened in Rogers, Arkansas in 1962. They now have nearly 10,000 stores worldwide. Target opened its first store in Roseville, Minnesota in 1962. They currently have about 1,750 stores in the US.
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Answer this riddle, if you have me, you want to share me if you share me I don't exist #riddle
Its a secret. It's tempting to share but when you do share it, it's not yours alone anymore and the secret no longer is a secret.
DEFINITION of SECRET (from Merriam-Webster):
kept from knowledge or view (hidden)
marked by the habit of discretion (closemouthed)
working with hidden aims or methods (undercover)
not acknowledged
remote from human frequentation or notice (secluded)
revealed only to the initiated (esoteric)
designed to elude observation or detection
containing information whose unauthorized disclosure could endanger national security (confidential, top secret)
ORIGIN of SECRET: 1350–1400; Middle English secrette Old French secret Latin sēcrētus hidden, orig. past participle of sēcernere
Speaking of secret, Hugh Grant 'is now a father of three after having a secret son with a Swedish TV boss.' Read more at the Daily Mail.
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What did bonzo say when he saw the ivy-covered walls of the ivy league collage?
The answer to that classwork Pizzazz is "ICIV" (I see ivy).
Check the answer by solving the algebraic equations here.
Many people have trouble with Algebra for various reasons. But algebra is quite easy once you get the hang of it. Check out some tips for solving algebra word problems at Andmathtutoring.com.
A recent study from the University of California, Santa Barbara, found that individuals who possess both strong math and social skills saw higher earnings over a 20-year period than individuals with only one set of skills. Find out more at the Business Insider.
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Why did the cow keep jumping over the barrel? #frogs
Q: Why did the cow keep jumping over the barrel?
A: She was practicing for a moon shot.
The answer is popularly used in a puzzle that is decoded by solving math problems. The solution spells out a word or sentence that will solve a joke or a riddle.
Other sample jokes used are:
Why are handcuffs like souvenirs? A: They are made for two wrists.
What happened to the snowman during the heat wave? A: He made a pool of himself.
Why did the quiz show give away $10,000 plus one banana? A: They wanted the prize to have appeal.
Why is life like a shower? A: One wrong turn and you’re in hot water.
Why did King Kong eat a truck? A: He always wanted a big mack.
What happens if the Jolly Green Giant steps on your house? A: You will get mushed rooms.
A jumping cow was spotted in a suspicious British UFO video. The Huffington Post showed the "jumping cow" video to someone who knows about building a real working remote-controlled "UFO" in order to gauge people's reactions. Read more here.
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Whats the answer to the riddle "What is the difference between a 16-ounce brick and a carpenter?"
We've heard this riddle told several different ways; in addition to:
What is the difference between a 16 ounce brick and a carpenter
We've heard:
• What is the difference between 16 ounces of meat and a drummer boy?
• What is the difference between a grocer selling a pound of sugar and an apothecary's boy with a pestle and mortar?
All have the same answer:
One weighs a pound, and the other pounds away!
It's really a play on words, a kind of joke using a word or words that can have two meanings; in this case pound is used as both a verb and a noun.
Writers Digest offers writing tips and advice with Seven Techniques (And Definitions) For Creating a Play on Words.
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What happened when the ghost disappeared in a fog? #ghost #fog #joke
The answer to that joke is He was mist (He was missed).
If you believe in ghosts, you're not alone: A Gallup poll found that 37 percent of Americans believe in haunted houses, and about one-third believe in ghosts. Tens of thousands of people around the world actively search for ghosts as a hobby with 2,000 active amateur ghost-hunting groups in America. Read more at Live Science.
According to MiamiHerald.com, a southwest Florida couple says a "harmless" ghost is included in the sale of their historic home. Sellers tell the Sarasota Herald-Tribune that they were alerted to the supernatural presence when they bought the Punt@ Gorda home in 2001. Find out more here.
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When is a wrestler king of the ring joke answer
Q: When is a wrestler king of the ring?
A: When he sits on the thrown (throne). Hahahahaha!
Find more humor with jokes about wrestling at:
MENSXP.com - Jokes about wrestling.
Jokes4Us.com - WWE jokes.
Sports Joke Cafe - Funny wrestling jokes.
In joke news, the CBS hit sitcom 2 Broke Girls is catching media attention after at least 100 complaints were made to the FCC about the raunchy jokes told by its characters. Some viewers say the show is too racy for prime time.
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Why did the farmer's daughter watch the lazy cow
Q: Why did the farmer's daughter watch the lazy cows?
A: She liked seeing the meat loaf!
Joke4Us.com has more cow jokes to entertain you:
Q: Why don't cows have any money? A: Because farmers milk them dry
Q: What do you get if you cross an angry sheep and a moody cow? A: An animal that's in a baaaaaaaad moooooood.
Q: Do you know why the cow jumped over the moon? A: The farmer had cold hands.
Q: Why did the cow cross the road? A: To get to the udder side.
Q: What do you call a cow you can't see? A: Camooflauged.
Q: Where do cows go for lunch? A: The calf-eteria.
Q: What do you call cattle with a sense of humor? A: Laughing stock.
Q: What are a cows favorite subjects in school? A: Moosic, psycowolgy, cowculus.
Q: What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck? A: Milk and Quackers!
Q: Where do you find the most cows? A: Moo-York.
In the news, as part of its plan to reduce U.S. greenhouse gas emissions, the Obama administration is targeting to regulate cow flatulence as part of climate agenda. Read more at Daily Caller.
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What happened when the crossword puzzle champion died #joke
Q: What happened when the crossword puzzle champion died?
A: They buried him six down and eight across.
Of interest, Dan Feyer is currently the champion of The American Crossword Puzzle Tournament, the largest and oldest U.S. crossword-solving tournament held annually in late February or early March. Watch Dan show his skills in the video below.
The crossword puzzle had just celebrated its 100th birthday! Discover the roots of a hobby that wasn't expected to last at The Washington Post.
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Why did the kangaroo see a psychiatrist #kangaroo #psychiatrist #joke
Q: Why did the kangaroo see a psychiatrist?
A: Because he always felt jumpy!
One good joke deserves more!
Q: What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo? A: A pouch potato!
Q: What do you get when you cross a snake and a kangaroo? A: A jumprope!
Q: How do sick kangaroos get better? A: They have a hoperation!
Q: What do you call 144 kangaroos in a box? A: Gross
Q: How does a kangaroo win a gold medal? A: In the long jump.
Q: Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? A: Yes, because the Empire State Building can't jump!
Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien? A: A Mars-upial
Get more kangaroo jokes from Jokes4us.com.
Tips! Learn how to tell jokes like a pro at The Guardian.
Of interest, discover amazing facts about kangaroos from OneKind.org.
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What did the electrician say to his daughter when she came home at 2 am #electrician #riddle
Q: What did the electrician say to his daughter when she came home at 2 A.M.?
A: The daughter says to father: "I'm ohm!" (I'm home!) The father responds: "Wire you insulate?" (Why are you in so late?)
This is a pun, a joke exploiting the different possible meanings of a word. The words "ohm", "wire" and "insulate" are related to electricity and are terms electricians use.
In joke buzz, a joke book aimed at young Spanish boys has been taken off shelves by its publisher after it was deemed inappropriate and offensive to women. Read more at New York Daily News.
9GAG - Electricity Jokes. via kwout
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What did the math teacher say after spending 8 hours in the ice and snow #snow #ice #riddles
Q: What did the math teacher say after spending 8 hours in the ice and snow?
This question appeared in Math worksheets with pizzazz which provide puzzles for students to solve while using math skills at grade level.
The answer could be "I am a numb brr or I feel like a numb brr or whatever phrase that fits the puzzle. The word number (numb brr) should appear in the answer. (It is of course a play on “number”.)
Try to find the solution for this What Did the Math Teacher Say After Spending 8 Hours in the Ice and Snow question.
It is difficult to recommend better methods for studying and for learning Algebra because the best methods vary from person to person. Read AlgebraHelp.com's tips which can be the foundation to a good Algebra study program.
In the news, more than 100,000 Arizona students failed the math portion of the Arizona Instrument to Measure Standards this year – more than five times as many than those who failed reading. Read more at azcentral.
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Math riddle, why do girls like guys who year shirts with eight buttons? #buttons #girls
Q: Why do girls like guys who wear shirts with eight buttons?
A: Because they fascinate! (fasten eight)
Try this:
Use only addition: how can you add eight 8's to get the number 1,000?
Two fathers and two sons sat down to eat eggs for breakfast. They ate exactly 3 eggs, each person had one egg.
What is the smallest 3-digit palindrome divisible by 18?
Be like a Math expert by solving "Math Riddles". Visit the following sites:
Steve Miller's Math Riddles
Math Warehouse
Online Math Learning
Get your brain in gear. Recent research suggests that crosswords, puzzles, sudokus and other brain teasers actually keep your brain in shape. Read more at Mumbai Mirror.
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finish the riddel what would happen if the jolly green giant were to step on your house #riddle
Q: What would happen if the jolly green giant were to step on your house?
A: You will get "mushed rooms" (mushrooms).
Jolly Green Giant is a mascot of the Green Giant company that offers products ranging from fresh vegetable, fruits to herbs.
The company is marketing their fresh mushroom varieties that include: White (Agaricus), Crimini, Portabella, Shiitake, Oyster and Enoki.
Speaking of mushrooms, it turns out that psychedelics aren't just good for turning into an elf and jousting a car. Reported studies have found the psychedelic compound found in magic mushrooms, psilocybin, can allegedly help people move past major life issues — like beating alcoholism and becoming more empathetic. Read more at PolyMic.
Find preparation tips to ensure perfectly cooked mushrooms at MushroomInfo.com.
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Why did the donkey get a passport #talkingbird #spellingbee #donkey
Why did the donkey get a passport? One of the reasons could be he wanted to be a travel burro haha!
Duckesters.com has a giant list of jokes, puns, and riddles for children!
Donkeys in the UK and Europe actually have a "passport" to ensure that they will not enter the food chain, according to the Donkey Sanctuary! The forms require a silhouette drawing of the animal with a written description emphasizing distinctive markings.
Like donkeys? Check out the book titled "Saving Simon: How a Rescue Donkey Taught Me the Meaning of Compassion" by New York Times best-selling author Jon Katz. Read a review of it from USA Today.
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Whats the answer to the riddle "What is the difference between a 16-ounce brick and a carpenter?"
We've heard this riddle told several different ways; in addition to:
What is the difference between a 16 ounce brick and a carpenter
We've heard:
• What is the difference between 16 ounces of meat and a drummer boy?
• What is the difference between a grocer selling a pound of sugar and an apothecary's boy with a pestle and mortar?
All have the same answer:
One weighs a pound, and the other pounds away!
It's really a play on words, a kind of joke using a word or words that can have two meanings; in this case pound is used as both a verb and a noun.
Writers Digest offers writing tips and advice with Seven Techniques (And Definitions) For Creating a Play on Words.
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